Blog 5: ATM

Okay so right now my nana is inthe hospital, and i am really upset about this. I am reall close with her. She is so important to me. She has been getting these head aches and tings for a while so sh wentto the doctors and guess what they didnt do a thing. So she went and had some tests done and waited for the results for a long time. Longer then you should have normally have to wait for something like that. I need to blog about this so i can get my feelings out cause i cant say it to anyone i know so. Okay so she went back to the hospital and got so many more tests done and yeah she is in the CCU which is the critical care unit so im not even suppost to go see her, cause you have to be 18 or whatever to get in but bull i am going to see her today. Fr the last 3 days she has been getting tests done and still no reults they said that the doctors will look at them on monday like do it now what if its something serious. I really hate hospitals! And i am praying nothing is seriously wrong and i hope she gets out soon.:)

Blog4: Boys Cont.

Okay so after Ryan I moved on and on and on if you catch my drift but none of them compaired to him. I asked Ryan to my freshman formal..but he said he couldnt go after he told me he could. He told me he got grounded to this day I do not know if it is true. But that lead me to asking this other kid name Ron. Ron was a good looking guy and he was so sweeet and nice to me. A few months after the formal he asked me out. I thought it was great. He said the sweetest things to me everything ws perfect till we hit 4 months from then things started to go down hill he w talking to alot of other girls commenting them on how pretty they are and hanging out with them when they are so wasted and all over him. I could not handle being cheated on not that I was but I was not going to take that chance so I broke up with him. After him which s currently now I am going out with the boy who I went out with twice before. But this time its different between us like somehow he got better at flirting. And he is so cute when we are together he puts his arm around me and plays with my hand and I never had that before but what I don't like is how he wont come with me to my friends house. He says its weird for him. That bothers me. I dont see the big deal, but different strokes for different folks. I hope he goes with me and gets used to it so he doesnt feel quote weird unquote. Thats it for now:)

Blog3:Boys

Every girl goes through a cottie stage right? I hate to tell you but nope, not all girls do. I can tell you every single crush I had. My first believe it or not was in pre-school, and yes i remember his name. I remember all there names. I dont wanna bore yu to death by naming all them from when I was little so I'll talk about more recent boys, not everyone just the important ones. I actually can't even say that cause I believe that all the boys I considered my "boyfriend" made an impact on my life and who I am today. Well lets start with my 7th grade year I thought I really really liked this one boy names Ricky I said I loved him to myself I never told him but he hurt me and I learned when that happend I did not love him I just wanted myself to think I did. After Ricky I had alot more "boyfriends" that each lasted for like a week each. A little before Easter I started going out with this boy named Evan, I stayed with him for what I thought was a while which was actually a couple months I didnt even like him that much. I guess I just wanted a boyfriend at that time. I remember having my friend break up with him over the phone for me cause someother boy liked me. Then I had this other boy and I recall going out with him for like only a month or so but then broke with him cause I was sick of hearing crap about us being together. After I broke up with him we stopped talking. Then one day I saw him in McDonalds and we started talking to him again we were real good friends and then he asked me out again and I kept putting it off but he would just continue to ask and then one day I finally said yes. A week later I broke up with him. I broke up with him because we were like best friends I know guys hate to hear your like a brother to me but thats what he was like to me so I had to do it. After them im not sure when, but I started going out with this boy named Ryan. I went out with him for a while. Sometimes he would be the cutest thing but when we were around other people I hate to say it but he acted different, and man i fell so hard for him. I know they say your too young to fall in love but thats so not true. I believe you can fall in love at any age. I was completly and tottaly inlove with him. I loved all of him the way he looked the way he smelled and he was so funny he could make me laugh so hard. But I guess I was so in love with him i began to be clingy. I hate that that happend but I guess it did. And after like 8 months I was dumped. It was so hard for me to deal with that. I found out over the computer when I read that I was shocked I didnt know what to do. I picked up my phone and callled my friend and she ran and picked me up and we went to her house and we made chocolate everything! And trust me when I say everything I mean everything! She comforted me just like i needed to be, and for that I so glad to call her my best friend. There however was one downside to her house. She and Ryan were cousins and they lived close. This memory is still clear as day in my head. He came over. We were in the kitchen. And I saw him and cried I cried so hard it was so hard to be inches away from the one that broke your heart. I never ever cried infront of a boy! I was raised with the sayin "Never let eem see you cry" which just means never cry infront of a boy, and I never did till then. But after awhile I began to heal don't get me wrong I was still devastated. I remember him texting me and me jut ignoring him and that was so so so hard to do that one day I cracked and answerd him back. Before I go any furter I have to tell you before when we were going out for a long time we never kissed. Back to where I was so after it was to hard to ignore him we began to talk more and then we started hanging out. There was this one night that I will remembe for the rest of my life. We were both at my friends ,his cousins, and we both stayed the night I mean that night there was some flirting but that was normal for us. So I thought nothing of it. Later on that night my friend fell asleep and we were both still up and he asked me how come when we were going out when he asked me to kiss I said no. And to this day iv never told him truly why. So he asked me why and I didnt answer so he was just like your scared scardy cat and stuff and of course I denied it and then he said prove it. At that moment I was so shocked so i didnt say anything so he says again prove it and then I finally got the guts to say okay still not being able to breath I was so nevous but I wanted it so bad. And thankfully he said after this song I like it which was the best thing he could have ever did i needed time to short things out in my head and man all i needed was that three min I was so ready. And after that song it happend. And let me remind you we were not even going out then. That morning I left and he left before me, but after I left I texted my friend and told her she was just like really when I was sleeping? Haha. She didnt seem suprised she had all faith in us more then we both did. But tha led to us hanging out another day. We went to the movies and he asked me out again, and with me being head over heels I was not gonna pass it up. I knew what I was risking but I could not pass it up. But sad to say I was dumped again. Being hurt but not as bad as the first time. I was babysitting with my cousin when I got the break up text. I remember alot of the good times we had together. I even remember when we first started going out. My friend was on aim and told me he wanted to go out and then I remember imin him saying so do we go out now and he said yes. And that was the start to that relationship, but what started it all was my friend's party. After the party we all went back to her house and thats when they flirng started. We got shaving cream for something I remember getting it and putting it on him. On his face and I made a shaving cream hand print on his back. We were the last people up. I was starting to fall asleep and he started talking about porslin dolls and that started that conversation, that went on for a while we only got like four hours of sleeep that night. Oh and one of the best times with him was when we went to New Jersey and he had an inground pool and a hot tube. Ah what a fun day. Oh and the best time I ever had with him was when we were in his room watching a movie and I laid my head on his chest. That was one of the most amazing moments I had with him. Now a days I still talk to him but I havent seen him in a long time.

THIS BLOG IS CONTINUED

Blog2: Friends

Okay so im a teenager I have lots of friends. But really these days we call anyone we talk to a friend, but me I dont worry about that I know who my true friends are and I have 4 of them and I cant live without them. I don't wanna state names so this is when im going to start using code names. My best friends are Brownie, Bunny, Pep and Sweets. Iv been friends with all of these people for a while and one of them off and on but I know I could never live without them. This one that I go on and off with means so much to me. They could be the sweetest thing at times but then they can be a butthead sometimes but I really think there over that stage but theres always one thing that stands in our way of our friendship. Okay for Brownie I practically knew them for my whole life we have so much good times together and I tell them pretty much everything. As for Bunny they were always there for me no matter what I know they would pick me up when ever I really needed to talk or just get out.And Pep is an amazing friend. I love having her there when smething is going on in my life. She isa great listener. She always gives me their honnest opinion which most of the time is a good hing.I love all so much! One of them I can tell absolutly everything to, I feel so unbelievebly comfortable telling my whole life to them. There is only one thing I cant tell them...